Top Ten Condiments IN THE WORLD

11) Hot Mess sauce

I don’t think this exists yet (thus #11) but it's still top 15 on the name alone. If anyone recently invented a sauce and needs a name I would be willing to license you the naming rights.

There is no way people could see “covered in Hot Mess Sauce” on a menu and not order it.

10) Duck Sauce

Not necessarily tops in QUALITY but that tends to be made up for with QUANTITY. Do I really need a full quart of duck sauce to dip five chicken fingers? Probably not. But most Chinese restaurants don’t want to risk it.

If you have ever eaten Chinese food and complained that the restaurant “did not give you enough duck sauce” then you have a serious problem.

9) Butterscotch

Condiments automatically get bonus points if they go well with ice cream.

8) Caramel

If an ice cream place offers both butterscotch AND caramel, I specifically ask for BOTH on my sundae. Mixing them isn’t alchemy or anything, but you will always get more TOTAL sauce by ordering both.

7) Sauce-They-Put-On-The-Chicken at any “Food Court” Chinese Food Place

Depending on the chain, they call it by different names but two things are ALWAYS the same:

1) The chicken is terrible

2) The sauce ON the chicken is amazing.

I don’t eat it due to reason #1, but you have to admit that it’s really not the sauce’s fault.

6) Arby's [self-titled] sauce

It’s hard to go wrong when a restaurant names a sauce after itself. You can be confident that the management have all tried the sauce themselves and are pretty damn sure that you will like it.

5) Sweet and Sour

Remember that time that you dipped something in sweet and sour sauce and did not like it? No, you don’t remember that because it hasn’t happened yet.

4) Hot Fudge

You don’t need me to explain this one to you.

3) Bojangles Honey Mustard

I have NEVER seen them give you less than two packets at a time. And I am pretty sure I know why. They must have given some guy only one pack back in the day and he must have gone postal. Now they always serve you AT LEAST 2 packs just to ensure that you don’t make a scene.

2) Lava

Best known for its work in “Molten Chocolate Lava Cakes”. Sometimes refered to as “ganache”. Little known fact: It actually tastes just as good without the cake! All that is really essential besides the Lava is a spoon.

1) Chick Fil A Sauce

Even God is pissed that it isn’t available on Sundays.

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